Now I know I am not supposed to have fear or be worried but sometimes… I cannot help it when it comes to Jax. You should see my face and how fast my heart beats when I hear him sneeze. I calculate alot of things. Before we go to the store I think is it cold outside, have I heard of any viruses going around , will there be alot of people there, do I really need to get said item? I know some may think oh she is overreacting or wants to keep him in a bubble. Ehhh Nope , that isn’t it. Jax is immunocompromised meaning a common cold, could be bad, pneumonia or flu.. let’s not even go there. A cold takes him about 2 to 3 weeks to get over. I can’t give him the normal cough syrup that you would five your child. When he sneezes, the Zyrtec or Claritan starts along with Maty’s baby chest rub ( I prefer that over Vicks ). His vitals are checked twice a day so I just pay close attention to make sure there isn’t an increase in his heart rate or fluctuations with his blood pressure. I’m the mom that if you sound sick, you are sick and you should stay away lol. Friends and family if you haven’t gotten your flu shot we will see you sometime next year. I love you all but I love my kid more. I especially love when we are at home and not at the hospital. I never thought I would check my son’s capillary refill , or make sure he’s breathing” just because”. To wonder if just because he says he is tired is it a normal tired or a “my heart is tired. If he doesn’t eat alot is it because he is becoming picky about his choice in food or is it “my heart is sick”. When he has Aa fever, is it a viral thing or heart rejection. It is not something I purposely do, I just know that anything is a possibility. I always pray for the best and know that even at the worst GOD will carry us through it. I wish there was a bubble that Jax could live in, but he is a little boy that needs to experience things. He was not blessed with another heart…his gift from Adrian just for me to keep him confined. I am only trying to make the best judgement calls that will benefit him in the long run. I have gotten better with some things but other things I just can’t help. It is a journey in itself being a heart mom. But as most should know I would not change it for the world. Jax is my blessing and I only try to be the same for him! Until Next time , Be kind to one another!!